Angela DeStasio
Show Notes
Angela DeStasio is a dance teacher and choreographer, who was previously an NBA dancer for the Philadelphia 76ers. Angela's story is one of resilience, love, and passion.
In today’s episode, Angela shares the challenges of being a dancer with Cystic Fibrosis and what her day to day life looks like, the positive takeaways from her college experience in addition to what didn’t serve her, and why the NBA was a great option for her until the COVID-19 pandemic.
She also explains her teaching philosophy and the impact she wants to make, the unexpected opportunities that came from sharing her story and advice on TikTok, and her passionate plea to dance while you can.
Follow along on Angela’s journey: TikTok & Instagram – @angdestasio
Transcript
Jessica - Intro
Hello and welcome to the Story Project. Today's guest is Angela DeStasio, a distinguished dancer, teacher, and choreographer from New Jersey. Diagnosed with cystic fibrosis at three months old, her parents needed to find an active outlet to keep her lungs healthy. When she started dance at five years old, her talent, work ethic, and passion were abundantly clear. Angela received a scholarship to attend Marymount Manhattan College, where she received her bachelor's in fine arts with an emphasis on choreography and composition. After graduating, she began her journey as a dance educator and became a professional dancer for the Philadelphia 76ers. Voted dance captain in her second season, she led the team to global performances, most notably for a full house at the O2 arena for the NBA London Games in 2018. She currently teaches jazz, ballet, contemporary, strengthening, and technique classes through private lessons and master classes in New Jersey and Philadelphia. Angela shares training tips for dancers and educators on TikTok, as well as stories of her own journey. Angela discusses how a whim led her to 20,000 followers on TikTok, her experiences as and passion to dance while you can. Please enjoy this beautiful and inspiring conversation with Angela DeStasio.
Jessica
Hi, Angela DeSstasio.
Angela
Hello, Miss Jessica!
Jessica
How are you today, my dearest friend?
Angela
I am so good. I had a busy day, busier than expected. A lot of the kids have nationals coming up, so they were trying to get into the studio and blah, blah. So busy week, but happy to do it. Yay.
Jessica
You're a superstar. So the first thing I want to ask you is, what is your human bio? So the things that we don't necessarily put on our resume or that's not on our LinkedIn BS. Who are you and how would you describe your bio? Yeah.
Angela
Not that I have much on my LinkedIn these days anyway, but who am I? Who is Angela? Oh my gosh. Where do I even begin? So I think that outside of a resume, the biggest thing that has shaped me into Angela would have to be my familial influence and how close knit my family is, that's a big part of my life. I have, as you know, seven nieces and nephews that I pour my heart into and try to spend as much time with as possible. I also love my dog to absolute pieces. I have my little four-year-old, Dachshund Milo, that I rescued, and he's the love of my life. Angela is, oh my gosh, Angela, about 10 years ago when we met is a little bit different than Angela 10 years ago, I'll tell you that. I feel like 10 years ago, I was a lot more, a lot more confident, but a lot less closed off, as you know, as our relationship has definitely, you know, become more open over the last 11 years or so that we've known each other. But Angela now is definitely more emotional, she is more open, she will absolutely cry at the drop of a hat, which was never me back in the day.
Jessica
Never.
Angela
Never. I never cried ever and I think that I legitimately have years of emotion and things that I just never let go of until recently. Um, so outside of a resume I would say. As a person, I feel like I...I don't know, I feel like I am strong. I have a lot of life experiences that have made me strong, whether I wanted them to or not. And I think that now I'm just trying to find the balance of all of these, like not new emotions, emotions that I've always had that I'm now able to communicate. And fitting that into having a little bit more confidence in myself like I used to have, like 18 year old Ang used to have in herself.
Jessica
So much confidence. Yeah, that's what we like.
Angela
That’s a long-winded dancer, but you got something. Ha ha ha. Yeah.
Jessica
That's what we like. Yeah, so Angela and I met in the BFA program for dance at Marymount Manhattan College in 2012. Is that correct? 2012.
Angela
Yes.
Angela
2012. Yeah, yeah, we started 2012.
Jessica
Yes, so almost 11 years ago.
Angela
Oh my god. I can't even believe it.
Jessica
And you know, we had some ups and downs, not as a friendship, our friendship was, yeah.
Angela
Not as a friendship, but extenuating circumstances. Oh yeah, we've been through some things together. Yeah, we have.
Jessica
Yeah, we've seen some life together and you're one of the biggest blessings that I've ever had in my life and certainly one of the biggest blessings that I got from a very painful time, a very trying time in life, but I wouldn't change it. I mean, do I wish that I wasn't miserable and I got to have you? Sure.
Angela
Yeah, can't have it all Jess
Jessica
Clearly not. I mean, I Remember talking to someone who said I'm so glad we went through all that trauma together because it brought us so close and I said Well, what if we didn't have to go through the trauma? Oh, we could still be close. Yeah, let's try to reframe this so It's not because we went through trauma that we're close like we could have probably gotten close otherwise
Angela
Right, right, what if we just got here?
Angela
Absolutely.
Angela
We could have got here, yeah. But the trauma bond just like expedited the situation a little bit, for sure.
Jessica
Absolutely. So can you tell us a little bit about what you're doing now in your life?
Angela
Yes, absolutely. So post college, I joined a NBA dance team. I danced for the Philadelphia 76ers for three seasons. I was lucky enough to be captain for two…
Jessica
Oh yeah!
But then, yes, but guess what girl, my third season was COVID. So that obviously changed everything for me specifically.
Jessica
Yikes.
Angela
So I know that whoever's listening to this probably does not know, but I have cystic fibrosis, which is a genetic lung pancreas, mainly lung and pancreas, but basically everything is getting affected by that. So when COVID happened, I needed to be smart in a time where everyone was going a little bit out of their minds. And I had to make the really hard decision not to go back when they finally allowed people back into the stadium. I just, I didn't feel safe. I didn't feel like the people around me were necessarily taking precautions that made me feel respected for them to have someone with a friend who had a lung disease. I just wasn't feeling like I was gonna put myself in the best position there. So made the tough choice to retire from that. And then I started teaching again. So outside of dance, I worked at a corporate dental office, which I no longer do. Different conversation for later, me and you.
Jessica
Okay, that's good to know.
Angela
Yeah, so now all my eggs are in the teaching basket. I love to teach.
Jessica
As they should be my Angie.
Angela
Really! And I'm starting to realize, so I got laid off about three months ago. I don't know if I would call it a layoff. We will talk about that later because I feel like you will have good advice for me. So after that happened, I was like, you know what? People on TikTok are really seeming to like appreciate my work with the kids and they're always messaging me saying how much my things are helping them and oh my gosh, this has been so great for my kid's technique. And I love the way that you talk to the kids and you're able to get your point across and you seem like you have a great relationship. And I'm like, you know what? Why am I not leaning into this? With CF. I can't be in an office. That's just, it is what it is. No matter which way we try to slice it, it's never gonna happen for me. I will never be able to get up and make it to an office at eight o'clock and sit there until five o'clock and then come home. It’s just not gonna happen for me. So I really realized over the past few months that this is a true gift that I have. Not only that, I feel like my story can help a lot of people as well. So I feel like I've been trying to be a little bit more open online with all of that just because I feel like that might be able to open up some doors that I'm not necessarily seeing at this point. But right now I'm teaching. I'm teaching at my home studio, which I love to death. I have a few master classes at other studios around Jersey this summer, which I'm thrilled for. Yeah, so I even have people from Canada who have asked me to choreograph solos for them next season. So I'm starting to see a little bit like blooms of the seeds that I've planted this spring and yeah, so I'm trying to lean into that right now. Take it and see where it goes.
Jessica
And it's also something that you've been interested in and loving for years.
Angela
No, absolutely.
Jessica
So even though you quit or you got laid off, whatever it was, and then you're building everything on TikTok and online, your whole life's work. Now you're getting to offer back.
Angela
Right, I feel like everything is finally coming to a head and now I just have to figure out how to channel my energy in the right direction. I have always loved to be in the classroom with the kids. I started assistant teaching when I was 13 years old at the studio and I would help in one to two classes a week. Right after college I went into teaching as I was doing a bunch of other stuff. So now it's a little bit different, focusing just on the dance education aspect and not like the performance and professional aspect. So yeah, it's been really interesting and I'm still trying to figure out how to make it like a cohesive career that can sustain me moving forward. You know what I mean? But I think that the steps that I have taken, I feel like I'm finally starting to see some reward from that. So it's been nice.
Jessica
It's so nice seeing you flourish in that way. And it's definitely gonna happen and we can keep chatting and figuring out how to make it happen. We have very similar interests in terms of teaching and we have a different approach potentially and like what we teach, but we are trying to build something because we love it and we're fighting for that.
Angela
Yeah.Right, like I want this to be what I do. I don't wanna be a dental office manager slash dance teacher. I wanna be a dance teacher, that's it. And I want that to be able to sustain my life and a future family and I'm just trying to make it work, so yeah.
Jessica
Well, you're doing an amazing job and everyone is so lucky to learn from you. And when you started putting things out there online, it was very inspiring to me because I feel like I have a lot I wanna offer both in terms of teaching, but also in my writing and this and that, and having you post your words of wisdom and your teaching techniques and the videos of you in the classroom. I feel like it's a gift that you're giving me. I think sometimes when you post content, it can feel kind of like, oh, I'm showing off or whatever it is.
Angela
Yes, like performative almost, right.
Jessica
Yeah, but when I receive it from you, I'm like, oh no, I'm gaining so much. She's giving me a gift. And I know it's hard to put that out there. So I know that she had to put effort both in terms of her time and energy, but also to overcome any kind of insecurities or anything like that. So I have so much respect for people who can do that. So you just doing that has inspired me and I'm sure that it inspires people not just in what you're teaching, but in the act of actually putting out there. Yeah.
Angela
I love to hear that. I love to hear that because it is hard. I did it out of a whim, Jess. My kids wanted to make a fun TikTok for Christmas, and I posted a fun TikTok of them for Christmas, and then I woke up the next day and I started gaining a lot of followers, and then I didn't post for a while. I didn't post for like three months, and then I was in a private lesson with my niece Emma. And I thought, you know what, I'm just gonna set up my phone and I'm gonna record and I'm gonna see what happens. And I was able to take the clips from that one private and turn them into 6 to 10 videos that just kept getting views and kept getting great feedback from teachers. And it is nice to have other well-respected teachers and professional dancers to reach out to you and say I really appreciate what you're doing and sharing all this stuff. And yeah, it just makes you think because I feel like it's always so hard as a dance teacher, especially as a younger dance teacher. Well, younger, I'm now 29, so I'm like hitting the cusp of not being young anymore.
Jessica
It is still... You have people teaching into their 80s and 90s.
Angela
That's what I'm saying. So I guess that's right. Yeah, cause like we're used to having like older, older teachers, but I feel like I have such a good balance with them, which is why the kids connect to me so much because I have that good balance of like authoritarian, dance teacher, big sister, friend when I need to be, let's get back to business. You know what I mean?
Jessica
Mm-hmm.
Angela
Whereas like our teachers back in the day were very much like. Well, let's get to business. No funny business at all. Like this is what we're doing. And I think that it's important to build that relationship with your kids. And I'm glad that I was able to do that because I've been getting, like I said, a lot of feedback, not only from the people online, but from the moms at the studio seek me out to tell me, you've helped so-and-so come out of her shell this year. Thank you for seeing her. Thank you for giving her that extra two seconds of attention. And when I talk to my sisters about this, I always say like, I really do try to make it a goal that every single kid feels seen and heard when they leave my classroom. It's not enough to have your two favorites that you're pouring all of your attention into all the time. You know?
Jessica
Mm. Yes. Oh yes, I do know. I do know.
Angela
…because there's so much untapped potential in the kids who don't feel like they're even getting looked at. And I feel like in my classroom, you are getting looked at and that's why I've seen so much growth in my classroom.
Jessica
Yeah. And I also think when you're teaching a big group class, I don't know what your studio's like, but my studio from home has a whole mix of people who are doing it because their friends are doing it and it's social, people who are doing it because they love to dance and it's recreational, they don't want to pursue it, and then people who are really trying to pursue it. And so having to teach a class with all of those varied levels and reasons for being there can be really tricky. So it takes a lot of effort and intention to see each person and to give them what they need. Like some of them just need encouragement as a human being.
Angela
No, absolutely. They literally just need you to say, good job, love the way you did that level change, and then you can give them a correction. But like, they're just looking for that acknowledgement, that you're even looking in their direction. Yeah, that's so true.
Jessica
Mm-hmm, it's an invaluable gift that you're giving people. So, rewinding a little bit, what brought you into dance and what was your training like growing up and all the early side of Angela?
Angela
Yes, absolutely. So I am the youngest of four and I was absolutely an accident.
Jessica
RITA!
Angela
Me and my closest sibling are 10 years apart. So growing up, like, yeah, I had my older siblings, but they were already grown. So my, one of my older sisters also has cystic fibrosis. So when I was originally born, they had told my mom that I did not have CF. And then when she brought me home, she started seeing some signs, and then at three months old, they did a full panel of all the mutations for me, and lo and behold, I had it. So, finding a physical outlet was always a priority for my parents for me. So I tried a few things growing up. I tried...T-ball, I tried basketball, and my cousin danced at my studio. So my aunt was like, you know what, Rita, let me bring her with me. So practices were actually on a Saturday, and I had just tried out for the basketball team. So my mom was like, you have to pick one. I thank the universe every single day that I pick dance because who the hell knows where I would have been, right? Yeah.
Jessica
I want to see you play basketball and T-ball.
Angela
So bad, I definitely have pictures of the T-ball outfit. But yeah, so I started dancing because my parents wanted me to do something active to keep my lungs healthy, was basically the bottom line. And then, because I didn't start until I was five, which if you're a dancer, dancers typically start at these studios two, three years old, like as young as two. So I was already behind at this point. So I go in, I remember it. I fell in love, like immediately. I was like, I'm pretty good at this. I'm like, I could, I had great rhythm off the bat. I had great memory. I could pick up choreography really well. The first week I remember I couldn't do a split. I went back the next week and I knew how to do a split. Like I just, it happened so naturally for me. So I joined, they asked me to join the competition team… My second year, they were making a competition team and it was a group of 12 of us. And we got to compete a little ballet number and a tap number. The tap number was to Itsy Bitsy Spider, we were so cute. And that was it. I was obsessed from that point. I got a solo when I was 10. There was two of us that got a solo, so I was one of the first two out of my group that got a solo and I remember being so excited for that. I remember when I got the solo letter in the mail, I actually had mono, like terrible, terrible mono, like on the couch, couldn't even keep my eyes open. And then I remember my sisters and my mom came in with the letter and we were so excited. We were like, oh my God, what does this mean? Cause I was the first dancer in the family. So I competed my whole life, going to competitions, conventions, started going to nationals, started going to summer intensives. Originally was not in the plans for me to go to school for dance at all. Wasn't even a thought.
Jessica
Mmm.
Angela
I went into my dance studio my senior year and they were asking me, my two studio owners, one of which is my mentor to this day. And she says like, what are you doing next year? Where are you going? And I like listed off like some names of colleges and the look that she gave me, Jessica, she was like, what do you mean you're not going to dance? Mind you, I had spent my entire time at that studio hearing her talk crap about people who went to dance, went to school for dance. Okay? But she looked at me and she was like, you have to dance. Like what do you mean you're not dancing? I got in the car. I called my mom sobbing, crying. I was like, I don’t know what to do, they're so mad at me. She was like, well, what do you want to do? And I said, well, obviously, mom, I would love to dance forever. So she was like, okay, come home. We're going to do your research and we'll go. I applied to Marymount. I didn't even tour the college, Jessica. Did not even go. I went the audition day. They accepted me after I did my solo and that was it. I was like, I guess I live here now.
Jessica
Oh my gosh.
Angela
And that was literally it. Yeah, so then trained obviously at Marymount for four years, graduated with a concentration of choreography, which I am still so grateful that I chose that track to this day. And yeah, that was basically my little Ange to college Ange story, and then you got from college on with Sixers and teaching. But yeah, that's the whole story.
Jessica
Mm-hmm.
Angela
I was, it was like an addiction. So I remember in high school, we did a benefit for CF and they had me speak in the beginning. And my mom and my sisters always used to love when I said, I used to dance to live, but now I live to dance. And like that was like the hard hitter.
Jessica
I just got chills. Yeah.
Angela
People would love that. But yeah, it's so true. Like it started as like a physical necessity and then it turned into something that I like could not be without. So yeah, it's a beautiful journey to get here. It's been a little rocky but sometimes.
Jessica
Little rocky sometimes. Little rocky. Yeah. So what was your college experience like?
Angela
Oh my god, college? It was a love, it was a love hate. I loved my friends, obviously. Like there was a core of us who...
Jessica
Who'd you love the most?
Angela
Nick.
Jessica
Ah!
Angela
No, no. Nick and you were always my faves. You know you were my fave.
Jessica
It's okay, I understand saying Nick, because... I mean…
Angela
But, I mean, like who makes you laugh the most in college? It was Nick, obviously.
Jessica
Nick, of course. Yeah, of course, of course.
Angela
But yeah, like my friends, I feel like we had a really, really great and smart group of friends. What?
Jessica
Oh wait, let me tell you something here on the pod. I'll have to cut it out if he tells me to. Nick is making his Broadway debut in Moulin Rouge as a swing and dance captain.
Angela
OH– I'm so happy! Oh my God, like I could cry right now. I'm so happy for him. Oh my God, my heart. My heart and literal soul. I love him so much. I know I never speak to him really, but I, there's such a special place in my heart for that boy. Yeah, so special, so special. But yeah, I feel like we had a really, really good group of smart people that we were friends with. Smart people who were able to have a good time. And like we were not partiers ever. Like we didn't go out. We didn't, like I hear my fiance's stories from college. I'm like, oh my God, you were an alcoholic. Like what were you doing there? Because our college experience was so different. I had.
Jessica
Yeah. We would just get like hang out in our living room and like, yeah, exactly.
Angela
And like order insomnia cookies, like... And like maybe every once in a while get a bottle of wine. Like it was never that serious. Now, the teachers I really had ups and downs with. Like I remember my freshman year getting absolutely berated by my modern teacher. She used to fixate on like one person every once in a while and I was the first person and I was like having imposter syndrome. I was like, do I even frickin belong here? Like I can't even do a saut de chat without her yelling at me. I'm like, this is like an awful experience. But then ballet, we had Mr. Ferro and I just...
Jessica
Hmm.
Angela
He made me love ballet. I hated ballet growing up. My studio was not a big ballet studio at all. Obviously we would take it twice a week, but it wasn't like, it wasn't anything like we were doing in college or at a lot of these other pre-pro studios that you see or comp studios. But he made me love it. Like he was just so joyful. Like.
Jessica
So joyful.
Angela
I could close my eyes and hear his voice and see him in his little tie-up tan jazz shoes and jeans and black shirt. I'm in love with him. I love him so much. He was the first teacher at Marymount that made me feel seen, as we were talking about me reciprocating that to my students these days. He really ignited a love of ballet in me that I didn't even know existed. Of course, there were other teachers that I really felt connected with the only one that I would say would be on the same level as Mr. Ferro would have to be JC.
Jessica
I knew you were gonna say that. I knew.
Angela
Me and JC, there was something about us. There was something about us that we just, he really saw something in me and made me feel like I wasn't a complete failure when I walked into ballet because there was a lot of teachers that I would, Ms. Comendador, love her to death, could not be any more terrified of a person if I tried. Could not. Like I would not breathe when she was anywhere near me, giving me a correction. But JC was never like that. JC was always so open. He was always, he always gave you a correction like sternly, but like gave you that little smile at the end so you knew that he wasn't doing it in a judgy way. You know what I mean? But college was way different than competition for me. I didn't do any concert dance until I stepped into Marymount Manhattan College.
Jessica
Different world.
Angela
That was so different. Like, I'm like, what do you mean we're gonna have a 26 minute dance?
Jessica
Hahahaha
Angela
I'm like, what are you talking about? I'm like Ah, like I just, I don't know, it was so different, but like honestly, as much as I would say, like I wouldn't change anything because it like led me to this point. I don't know if I would have chosen to go to Marymount if I knew everything that I knew now.
Jessica
I definitely would not have.
Angela
Like, and I always struggle with that in my head because I'm like, then you wouldn't be where you are and everything might be different. But I'm like, damn girl, you got all those loans for what?
Jessica
I'm glad I went to school for it. It wasn't the right program for me.
Angela
Yeah.
Jessica
The one thing I was going to say about, I'm just cracking up at the thought of you coming from this competition studio. And then remember the piece freshman year where I think it was, I mean, no, the one where, yes. Someone had to.
Angela
Hahaha!
Angela
This one, you know which one I'm talking about.
Jessica
Someone had to stand and spin in a circle for 10 full minutes in the downstage corner.
Angela
No, I don't remember.
Jessica
And she had to just stand and spin.
Angela
I REMEMBER!
Angela
Jessica, my family came to see...My family came to see my freshman year. They were like, oh. And I was like, yeah, this is my life now. This is what I do.
Jessica
The shock must be out of this world.
Angela
But dude, like a crazy shock, a crazy difference. But the one thing that I will always, like the best thing that I took out of Marymount was my ballet technique because I had little, not little to none, obviously I did ballet growing up, but learning from specifically JC helped inform how I communicate imagery and feelings in the body and the way that I'm like telling my students like what this should feel like. He really changed the way that I thought about teaching dance. My biggest, happiest takeaway would be how I really transformed my ballet and was able to absorb the teaching techniques of my favorite teachers. Because I do see that stuff coming out as I teach now.
Jessica
I feel like we can all agree on a lot of great things and we can all agree on a lot of horrible things about college. And it's interesting because I am the complete opposite as what you're saying about ballet specifically. I feel like I loved ballet in high school. I would have been a bunhead if I could have. And I went there and I learned to hate it because it made me hate my body. It made me hate what I was not capable of doing. I was not celebrated for being able to perform through ballet anymore.
Angela
Right, right.
Angela
Okay, pause. Our program was not like that at all. If you didn't have it, you didn't have it. That was it. You weren't getting resources to fix.
Jessica
Agreed! Agreed. There were some teachers though, like Catherine Cabeen, when I had Graham with Catherine. And first of all, in sophomore year, I had Lone. And Lone and Graham, I never thought I would love a class again so much. She was the teacher who helped me understand how to move through space in a time when I was so stressed and so...
Angela
Yeah. But can I pause and say, Marymount made us scared to move through space because every time I would move, I would get yelled at. And I'm like, what do you want me to do? So then like, they like strip you down to base. If you are not a favorite when you step into that building, they are stripping you down. Good luck building yourself back up. That's literally it. Yeah.
Jessica
Yes.
Angela
Can we also say that I got a B- in ballet almost every semester, so it's not like I am like ballet goddess either, you know what I mean?I think JC might've given me an A minus like my last semester ever.
Jessica
I mean - oh, just circling back quickly about Katherine. So I loved Graham with Lone sophomore year. I loved Horton with Christina.
Angela
Loved Horton. We had a great Horton class.
Jessica
Were we in the- oh yeah, we were in the- we did the dance. Okay.
Angela
Yes, princesses!
Jessica
And then the next year I went abroad, which was my saving grace.
Angela
Yeah, ruin my life.
Jessica
I know. We abandoned you.
Angela
My two best friends left me to go abroad and I'm like, okay, I'll just be here for you guys waiting for you to come back. Yeah, obviously.
Jessica
So we came back and had Catherine for Graham. And I was like, I can't even sit cross-legged anymore. Like my body is a disaster. My back hurts. My hips are so tight. I can't even sit cross-legged anymore. And she's like, oh, go get, let's get you a yoga block and sit on it. So she was so willing and wanting to work with me.
Angela
Yeah, right to make accommodations, exactly.
Jessica
Anyway, I love Catherine so much. That's beside the point, but.
Angela
No, I love Catherine too. I was in one of her pieces. We were!
Jessica
I was with you. So we each had some moments throughout school where our confidence was, dare I say, ruined. Or yeah, shat on.
Angela
Yeah, absolutely.
Jessica
And I was wondering if you wanted to voice any of those experiences that you had, whether it's to share them so that people know that it is not okay for people to speak to you that way or just to express that whatever.
Angela
I don't think that I can pinpoint an exact moment where a teacher said something that -
it was just the feeling that what they said, you I can't even put it into words. But you know what I mean, like there wasn't like a specific phrase. No one ever looked at me and said like, Oh, you're terrible. Whatever. It was just like me doing frickin leaps in Modern One week two and Nancy being like, What is that? Don't move out, you gotta go up and da da da da da and I'm like, What is happening? Like I literally just got here two days ago. I just got here two days ago. I'm like, what even is O'Donnell? What is it? Who is she? Right? Like, but there were a lot of moments where like, or even, you know what? A lot of those moments where we would have are like one-on-one ballet jury. Oh my God. Like I used to make myself sick and I knew they were gonna say the same shit to me every time. I knew they were gonna say to me, you have to work on your hands, your shoulders, your turnout needs to be better, whatever. I'm like, listen, boo, I'm never gonna be a prima. I'm here to work on my technique. So as long as my legs are straight and my feet are pointed and I'm turning out to my best ability, like you guys should just take what I got and tell me if I've improved or not. Like I don't need you to sit here and tell me everything that's wrong with me. But there were a lot of times in college, like after auditions, when I would get put in like a random DAW piece, I'm like, why am I here? I knew that I had so much more to give. Not only that, but Marymount back in the day did not have a lot of opportunity for true jazz, ever. Like, it was like the Hunger Games trying to get into a fucking jazz class. And I was like, this is what I'm good at. And I remember finally getting into a jazz class and like, Shi Shi looking at me and being like, oh shit, like who is this girl? And I'm like, I've been trying to tell y'all that this is what I'm good at.
Jessica
Yeah.
Angela
This is what I'm good at and you guys never let me have a chance to be here. And there were not performance opportunities for jazz. Marymount didn't even offer a commercial jazz class until way after we graduated. Right? So I feel like no one could ever really see my true potential as a dancer because I wasn't given the opportunity to shine in those genres. And yes, I probably should have picked a different program, whatever. But looking back, hindsight is 2020, right? But like where I felt like…
Jessica
Yeah. We're doing our best at 18, 17 years old.
Angela
Yeah, like I just got thrown in here. Like I didn't even want to go to school for dance necessarily. And like all of a sudden I find myself in Manhattan living by myself and I'm like, what the hell is going on? Something that I really did thrive at in college was my DAW pieces as a choreographer. Like I felt like that's where I was like, oh my God, like maybe I could be a choreographer. I'm pretty good at this. And I felt like those experiences I am grateful for from Marymount to give us the opportunity to choreograph as a student, because I know a lot of schools don't do that. And I feel like I learned probably the most in those rehearsals with my dancers on my own. That prepared me for after college more than anything as a dance educator now. I don't even remember what your original question was.
Jessica
So can you tell everyone about the incredible project that you did, I think our senior year, right?
Angela
Yeah, we did together.
Jessica
Yeah, well... Yeah.
Angela
Yes, what class was that for?
Jessica
Arts and social change, right?
Angela
Arts and social change. Yeah, I don't...
Jessica
I can't believe that just came out of my mouth.
Angela
I wanted to say drugs in the brain and I was like, that is not it.
Jessica
That was a good class though. I loved that class.
Angela
I loved that class. Yeah. We had to do a big project at the end of the year. So we decided that we were gonna do a little series, a little short documentary on invisible illness. So cystic fibrosis is an invisible illness. If you look at a picture of me, you're not gonna know anything is wrong with me. So there was a lot of times in school where people didn't know that I was sick because I look completely normal. So Jess followed me around for a day with the camera. She came to my jazz class. It was awesome.
Jessica
My dream come true.
Angela
She came to my jazz class at 8 a.m. Then we went to ballet together. And then I'm pretty sure I had composition and improv that day. So we were together all day and you interviewed me.
Jessica
Keep in mind in college, that's all I ever wanted from Ange. I was like, please just let me be with you. Don't push me away.
Angela
You got your dream come true. But it was a great project. We had such a great response to that project. And I really got to educate a lot of people and talk about some statistics about CF, showing me doing my treatments. There was some clips in there. I came back for spring semester and I had a PICC line, which is a long-term IV. So I would come to school with my picc line. My nurse would meet me at school in my apartment if I needed them, but I was like administering all of my IV antibiotics on my own. On top of going to school, on top of going to rehearsal, on top of going through Marymount Audition Week, which I don't even know how I did that, Jess, because I, like the last time that I had my picc line in, I believe last summer. I didn't have energy to do anything, so I'm like, my body really has changed drastically.
Jessica
Also, let me just say that I think there were two times in school that I ever saw you cry. And one of them was about a boy. And the other was at the end of senior year, you started crying because you were like, I can't believe I just did that. Like, I can't believe I did these four years.
Angela
Right, no, I remember before I even started going to school, my doctors were like, listen, going to college away from home with CF, taking care of yourself is like taking another three credit course. And boy, were they not joking. They were not joking. My freshman year, I like slacked off on my stuff for like three weeks. I was so sick. I'm like, I will never do this again.
Jessica
Mm-hmm.
Angela
I've learned my lesson and the rest of my time at school, I really made sure that I was on top of it. But yeah, graduating after, well, that was a really hard number that we did that season for that main stage and like that season. I felt so accomplished. Like I remember like bowing at the end of train and my lungs literally being on fire and being like, I can't believe that I just did that. Like that, and to this day, like I would never be able to do that again. You know what I mean? Like that was, I was in the best shape of my life at that time. We were running a 30 minute cardio piece back to back to back with those casts. Like I would not, I absolutely cannot do that now, but it was just like, I remember being so accomplished, like holy shit, like I cannot believe that I just did that. And I was so proud of myself. I still am, but yeah.
Jessica
Yeah, yes. Can you explain what, well, part of the documentary you had our improv class, Dancing and Breathing Through Straws.
Angela
Yes, yes, yes. So they used to tell us, I remember one of the respiratory therapists when I was in the hospital when I was younger, and they wouldn't be allowed to leave us in the room when we would do our treatments. Like it would just be like me and this random person. And I remember this one woman that I had, and she would say, Oh, have you ever had your friends breathe out of a straw with their mouth and hold their nose for like a minute? And I'm like, no. So when we came time to do this project, and I'm like, I am about to make you bitches dance like this right now. And I specifically remember Honza, who literally was the Energizer bunny, right?
Jessica
Yes.
Angela
We're like a minute in and he's like, whoa, like he can't. He like just, he couldn't breathe. So basically like the, you're breathing out of a straw. So your airways are constricted and then you're holding your nose. So you're only getting like a percentage of your lung capacity. So it's a great test to see how people with CF are feeling. We took it obviously a step further and had them dancing while they were doing it. But when it was over, everyone was like, oh my God, like I can't believe you do that. And I'm like, yeah, you got it. I'm like, you gotta push through. Not just gonna stop in the middle of the floor, you know what I mean? But yeah, that was a great exercise. I feel like that really opened up everyone's eyes. You did that one too. Yeah.
Jessica
Mm hmm. Yeah. And can you tell a little bit about what treatments are for you and like how much of your day that occupies?
Angela
Yeah. So as I've gotten older, they've taken up obviously more of my time. So CF is a degenerative disease, so it's going to continuously get worse as I get older, which means that all of my treatments and preventative care needs to be at a different level. Which is also why it was hard for me to work in an office because I would have to be in the office by 7.15 So I would be literally waking up at 5.40 in the morning to do my treatments which obviously made me more tired which made me more sick and whatever. So now if I am sick like I am right now I will try to do my treatments three times a day. If I'm having a normal, If I'm at like my baseline, so like my baseline is like, I cough a little bit here and there, but like I'm pretty much healthy, then I can take it down to once a day, if I feel like it. But I really try to do once or twice a day when I'm healthy, if I'm sick, then you need to bump it up. So now because I've been sick and I've been doing it an extra time, like it gets annoying because I'm sitting there, I'm strapped into this vest that has three buckles on it. It has two tubes on the side. So you plug in your two tubes and the tubes are connected to like this machine. That's a monitor. So the monitor has three different settings. One is how fast you're gonna shake. One is how tight the vest is gonna be and one is your timer. So I'll do it for 30 minutes. It depends, because I'm sick right now, I've been doing it at like a higher tightness and faster shaking, but if I'm just at baseline, I'll do, I'll split it up into like three 10 minute chunks where I'll raise the increments on my shaking and my tightness so I can get my airways, get deeper in my airways like as the treatment progresses. So as I'm doing my vest, I'm also doing some breathing treatments. One is called hypertonic saline. It's literally just salt water, basically, which you inhale, and that helps break down all of the gunk in your chest and help get it up, which is also what the shaking is for. You wanna dislodge the stuff in your chest, that way you can cough it up and get it out of your body is the ultimate goal. And then I also have a couple other nebulizers that I do, but typically the whole session is about 30 minutes. So depending on how I'm feeling, if I'm sick, then it'll be about almost two hours of my day that I spend doing these treatments. So it really, it is like a part-time job, literally taking care of yourself because outside of the treatments, then you're taking medicine every morning, every night, every time you eat, you can't just eat like a normal person. You have to take your medicine or else you're not gonna digest your food and your body's not gonna absorb your nutrients from your food. So then that causes a bunch of problems. It's a lot. It's definitely a lot and it's gotten obviously harder as I've gotten older. It's gotten harder as I've moved out of my parents' house because my mom was such a frickin rock star gem who would be like, take your medicine. Here's your stuff. Do this. Like she was always pushing me and it's just funny now because she's had talks with Antonis about being the same way. So now he's being more like stern and like, oh, five more minutes. He's like, no, here's your treatment, go sit over there. So like now for at least one of my treatments every day, we'll play Mario Kart for my entire treatment. So it'll like, so it'll go by faster. But yeah, no, it's a lot. It's a lot. And if you don't know me and if you're looking from the outside, like you have no clue, what’s going on. For sure, yeah.
Jessica
Yeah, well we didn't know freshman most of freshman year until you got sick. I don't think you told anybody and then you had to go to the hospital. We're all like where the heck's Ange?
Angela
Well, I got sick, I got sick, they put me on antibiotics. My body, for whatever reason, had a terrible reaction to the antibiotics. And I was like super backed up. And then that started causing a million more problems. So then I remember not being able to come back to school until like a few days after break or something. But that's when I had to tell everyone like, by the way, yeah.
Jessica
Yeah, it was enough that it was long enough that we were all like…
Angela
Where is she? Yeah. Yep. No, I remember that. I remember that. But like, that's a whole other thing is like, being someone with a chronic illness and coming into a brand new situation like college and not knowing how to disclose that to people because you don't know how they're going to take it. Not that I thought that you guys were going to like shun me in any way. I knew you guys weren't going to, but I'm like, oh, fuck, now I have to have this conversation again. You know what I mean?
Jessica
Yeah, yeah. I mean it's something that already is taking up so much space in your life and your day, yeah. Yep.
Angela
most of my day. Right. And in my brain. Mm-hmm. No, absolutely.
Jessica
How did you feel people were in terms of supporting you?
Angela
Oh my God, everyone was so supportive. Once everyone knew, like, there was not a time where I didn't come to school because I was sick and I didn't have like five people texting me, asking me if I was okay, if I need anything, checking in on me. Everyone was super supportive. Another hard part about that was telling the teachers too, because after I told the teachers,
Jessica
Hmm.
Angela
I felt like, oh my God, they're gonna see me differently. And guess what? Some of them did see me differently after that. Some didn't, but some definitely did.
Jessica
Hmm. How so?
Angela
um like I remember having my PICC line for auditions and I think it was Catherine's piece and I think it was Catherine's piece and I like went up to Katie and Nancy and I think that Katie knew but I don't think she really knew the scope and I don't think Nancy really knew either but like I always felt like there was an air of like feeling sorry for me after that.
Jessica
Mmm.
Angela
You know what I mean? Because it's one thing for me to tell you, it's another thing for you to physically see me dancing with a fucking PICC line in my arm. You know what I mean? And me having to say like, hey, cause I don't know if you remember, we were doing like that partnering where you would like lock elbows and like throw somebody. And I had to go up and I'd be like, I can't do this. My right arm literally has a 16 inch IV in it right now. Like I can't break it or else that's gonna be an issue.
Angela
And it was never like an outright like pity, but it was just something in the air and like the way that she like looked at me from then on out that made me feel like, well, now she thinks I'm weak. You know what I mean?
Jessica
Did you feel any kind of sense of that with anybody else, like any of us?
Angela
No, not even a little bit. If anything, I felt like you guys thought that I was stronger for that than weaker for that. Yeah. No, my college friends were always, always very over the top, supportive. And like you guys always wanted to ask questions and know as much as you could.
Jessica
Yeah.
Angela
Like it wasn't something that I just told you once and you guys like blew off. It was like, what else can I learn about this to help make your day to day any easier. And obviously I was so stubborn, so I wasn't obviously accepting any help at the time. But.
Jessica
You? No! You were so easy! You just like let me hug you and love on you and take care of you. You were like the easiest thing. Never. I would have to force.
Angela
Literally never, never.
Angela
and I would be pissed the entire time. Yeah, sounds about right.
Jessica
Yeah. It sounds completely right. Yeah. I think that was always interesting navigating with you because we became friends freshman year, but we became closer as the years went on. And I knew that strength that you had. And I knew that you were someone who would not want to be pitied or thought of in that way.
Angela
way. Right.
Jessica
And then I wanted to say though, and I think I don't know how I managed to do this. You can tell me if you think I did, but I just think you're fucking incredible and your strength and resilience was overwhelming and is overwhelming. And it honestly has completely changed how I look at the world and how I look at people. You are truly the strongest person I've ever met and you are my hero. And I guess it's like, how do I say that to you in a way that doesn't make you feel like, oh, it's because of the CF and whatever. Like, it's just, it's the whole, it's the whole life. It's your whole life. It's who you are.
Angela
Right. No, and I get, and I know, and I have never once felt that you were looking at me any differently. Like you, more than anybody, were always like the, my biggest cheerleader in all of it. So you have always done such a good job of expressing that to me, always. Always. Even to this day.
Jessica
I force myself back into your life, like we want to talk in a year. I'd be like, okay, I'm coming over. I text your fiance.
Angela
What's up? Yeah. But you know what? That's, I know, but it's just that's a testament to our friendship though. You know what I mean? Like we don't talk and then we talk and we're back in 2013. You know what I mean?
Jessica
Mm-hmm.
Angela
Like it's, that's never been an awkward thing for us ever.
Jessica
Yeah. Something I've been thinking about for you is you were dancing in such an intense environment from school and then the 76ers and like teaching obviously. Is there a way that you think you can perform again in a way that is actually possible for you in a way that will not make you feel sicker? Like is there a way that we can come up with some kind of plan, even if it's not in a professional context.
Angela
I'm sure there is.
Jessica
Cause you're, you're an incredible performer and dancer. And so.
Angela
Thank you. I mean, I would love to and I think that if I put every ounce of extra energy that I had into rebuilding my stamina that I once had, I don't even know if I would ever even be able to get it there because I don't know if my lung function could get back to that place again. You know what I mean? So like, I'm sure there is a world in which I could. I will say at the starting to get towards the end of like my Sixers time. I remember thinking like Sixers was such a great, and NBA was such a great option for me because you're on the court for a minute and 10 seconds max. So like I could be sick, I could be coughing, I went to games with my back thrown out from coughing. I'm like all I need to do is run out there and look cute, dance my ass off for a minute and 10 seconds, and then I can come back to the dressing room and do what I need to do. And then I could send a sub out there if I need to. You know what I mean? So like, it was almost like the perfect job for me. I could literally dance as full out as I wanted to for 70 seconds. And then that was it. Do I think that I can do that again? Yes. Do I think I can do that in like a jazz/Hip hop context, probably not. Just because the stamina, the cardio, I just, the past couple times that I've really tried to dance like that, I've blacked out, I've thrown up, I felt so sick that I couldn't catch my breath for like minutes, minutes, minutes. So like now there's that level of like fear associated with it too, that like I don't wanna push myself beyond that point because I don't wanna make myself feel like that again. I think that if it's like a contemporary lyrical combo or I could definitely hit you with a ballet adagio for sure. Petite Allegro, don't get your hopes up.
Jessica
I would never ask that of you, Angela.
Angela
But like I think that I hate Petite Allegro.
Jessica
I love Petite Allegro.
Angela
I'm so happy I can't do it. I know you can't. Like I can't. Me and my short Achilles cannot do it.
Jessica
I have shorter achilles and I still loved it just put me in a lot of pain. My achilles are way shorter than you Angela!
Angela
Like, my demi plie is very shallow, Jessica. Very.
Jessica
Angela, Angela.
Angela
Okay, we're pretty comparable. Don't start with me. That was something that I used to get told in freaking college all the time in my jury is that my calves were tight. Yeah. I'm like, what do you mean my calves are tight? I'm like, you guys had me running from 63rd to 71st in 10 minutes, uphill, in the snow. I'm like, yeah, my freaking calves hurt.
Jessica
In the snow.
Angela
Oh my god, don't get me started. But yes, I do think that there is a perfect world in which I can perform like a slower pace, something.
Jessica
What if you start doing more things, like you're doing a lot of teaching videos, will you start doing more of yourself dancing again?
Angela
I would, I think that right now I do have that fear about it though because even if it's just myself like I have tried I've tried to like just set up my camera and see what I could do and like it gets to the point where I you watch the video back and you're like well damn I looked more full out doing this three years ago so I'm not like I there's like that shaming aspect for yourself and I know that you shouldn't have that but from dancing at such like an elite level. So then completely dropping off with COVID and then like trying to get back into it. It's like, yeah, I could probably get there. It's never gonna quite be at that exact level again, but it would take literally all of my spare time to train to get my lungs back to that position. Like, and I don't even know if I can get there, like I've been saying, but I do think that there is, there's a possibility that I could do like a lyrical, contemporary improv situation. But anything that's like higher tempo, I literally cannot help myself and I have to dance full out and then I dance myself sick.
Jessica
Mm-hmm. What if you did like, what if you just choreographed an eight or 16 counts? You won't? Oh, you won't, yeah, yeah.
Angela
– doable. I can definitely do that. No, I could do 16 counts.
Jessica
I thought you were gonna say you won't just stop there.
Angela
I don't know if I would, I don't know if I would, but I think that like–
Jessica
If I was there, I'd make you.
Angela
I know you would. I think that like 45 seconds is probably my max that I can give you a full out anything at this moment, which is so sad, but.
Jessica
Well, maybe there's something to be said about like, something I keep trying to come back to is starting where you are and not being afraid to be messy and imperfect and like celebrating whatever we are doing right now, wherever we are right now. So what if we could look at it like, yeah, I'm gonna do a kick ass eight count of this…
Angela
Right.
Jessica
…amazing jazz dance. And I'm going to start there and I'm going to post it. And then my cutie TikTokers are going to be like, we want more Angie, we want more. Yeah, you just never, I mean, seeing you dance is such a gift. And it's really, I, it's devastating to not be able to do it in the way that you want and that you're used to. It's devastating.
Angela
I once had, right. Which is the biggest hurdle that I'm trying to currently get over at this point. Because this is something that I didn't even think about until a few, a few weeks ago, I went to teach a class at an adult school. So we have, it's kind of like a BDC situation. So it's like 17 and older can go take class here. So she, I reached out to her. Anyway, I went and I taught my first contemporary class last week. And when I tell you that I was so freaking scared Jessica to go into this class because I'm like, I'm gonna be expected to dance full out and I can't do it. So I ended up asking if I could bring Bella, my oldest niece, to dance for me when I couldn't because it gets really hard to teach and talk and dance and do it all at the same time. I just get really out of breath, I can't do it. So anyway, the end of class comes, everyone's coming up to me, whatever, everyone leaves and the social media lady comes in and she's like, I just wanna get a video of you doing it full out by yourself for promo. I literally looked at Bella with like, a look of fear in my eyes. And I don't like want tostart crying, but like Bella looked at me and she was like, you can do it and it was only like a 45 second combo and I did give it everything. And then even though I made it through, like I still look back and I'm like, well that could have been better and that could have been better and that could have been better. So it's just like, there's so many layers to it, right? There's like going from the professional level to then not being able to really dance. And then always as a dancer, you're always so judgmental of yourself, right? So like, it just has been piling. So now I'm like trying my best to put myself back out there, right? But it's gonna take baby steps because now I have like such a fear of not doing it well enough and I just have to get over it like it's never gonna be what it was when I was 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 right it's never gonna be like that so now I just have to find my new normal and be okay with it not being perfect you know what I mean but like there's such a mental block as a dancer because you always are your toughest freaking critic so yeah. That's what I have to say about that.
Jessica
So a couple of things. First of all, Bella, love her, love her.
Angela
The love of my life. My oldest niece who is now like my bestest friend, she will be 16 in August. She's like the sweetest girl in the world. She is literally a real life Disney princess. And I don't know what I would do without her to this day, but yeah, I would not. And I said that to my mom and my sister. I was like, I wouldn't have been able to do it without her there. I wouldn't have.
Jessica
Yeah. And that also goes back to when you were talking about your human bio, like yeah, you're a teacher, but also you're a family first lady. And that is a full circle, all encompassing moment that this person that you love so much is there to be like your body when you can't and –
Angela
– supportive, right. This person who I love so much who we get to share this like connection of dance in which is like so special.
Jessica
And you also teach her, right?
Angela
Yeah. Yeah.
Jessica
Which is another beautiful added layer. I'm just so appreciative that you shared all that because we do all have our insecurities and our fears and to be able to voice them is so rare and it's like why I wanted to start having these conversations. That was just like the epitome of why I wanted to do this right there because I, for me asking you, oh, are you going to post more about you performing? It's because–
Angela
Hahaha
Jessica
– I love watching you perform and obviously knowing you and knowing your story, of course, I would assume that there's some underlying sadness and heartbreak about not being able to dance like that again, anymore, of course. But I'm more just like, hey, why don't you just do it anyway? Like just, just like, just, just why don't you just post a little bit of dance? Come on. But. I think one of the most beautiful things about being a teacher is that when you tell your kids something, I shouldn't say kids, when you tell your students something, you look back at yourself and you're like, oh, you hypocrite.
Angela
Yeah, I'm like take your own advice bitch
Jessica
If you're if your student said to you like, oh, I don't want to post this video because I, I can only do a double and I think you have to do a triple, you know, whatever it is. What?
Angela
Do you know what I would say to that kid? I'd be like, are you joking? I'm like, I would literally say, like, why do you care? Because guess what? Nine times out of 10, people just scroll past your dance video anyway. And they're not gonna care that your relevé was not as high in this video as it was in the last one. Like, but that's the thing, Jess, is I know. I literally know. And it's just, there's just, there was a lot of pressure for me to go teach at this specific place because it was in Cherry Hill, so it's close to Philadelphia. I obviously have a reputation in Philadelphia as being really good, not to toot my own horn–
Jessica
Toot it, girl.
Angela
– but like being really good, not toot too, not a lot of people are made captain their second season as an NBA dancer, like it just doesn't happen. And like I used to run the clinics and I got to teach online on Instagram live and I was the full out dancer. That was me, right? So like now coming into this space that a lot of these people from Philadelphia who know the dance team world, know who I am, know my bio, but they're going to be in my class and then like to get there I don't want them to be like disappointed in what I have to offer, which is why I now, like if I'm teaching a master class or whatever, I am very open and I'm like, just to let you guys know, I have cystic fibrosis. Sometimes I get out of breath. It's hard for me to teach and talk and do a lot of things, so I might have to step out, whatever, whatever. Like I am now very forthcoming about that. And I'm happy that I am because one of the students that I had in my class actually messaged me after class to tell me that he just got back from, I believe it might've been Boston, that he studies different types of fibrosis and cystic was one of them that he studied a little bit. So, there was just a lot of pressure going into that specific setting.
Jessica
It's interesting as we get older and have more experiences outside of what we thought we were gonna do. Like, what did you think, on a quick tangent, what did you think you were going to do? Did you know, I had no idea.
Angela
Never not one time had a plan, Jess. Never not one time did I have a plan from the time I was 18 to the time I graduated college. And even after that, I had no idea what was going on at all. I was really excited after I graduated and I saw dance team stuff, because I was like, oh, this would actually be super duper fun. Like this is something that I could do still living at, yeah, this is something that I could do living at home.
Jessica
Yeah, so you.
Angela
Like at the time the Sixers were still very much like heavy jazz and techniques. I'm like, this is perfect for me. Um, and obviously like I was lucky enough to make it on my first time that I ever tried out. So like, obviously if that hadn't happened, I have no idea where I would be because as you know, right after school, college, like my mom was very, very sick. So, and I was her primary caregiver because all of my siblings were married with kids out of the house. So it was hard for me as a fresh college graduate, I was working at the pizzeria with my dad just to make any money that I could and because it was flexible and I can go home and be with my mom if I needed to, to then find time to spend $30 on a round trip ticket to get on the train to go to New York at four in the morning to write my name on a non-union list and then maybe not get seen. In my mind, I knew it wasn't sustainable. It would have been sustainable if I was able to live in the city after I had graduated. But because of my circumstances with my mom, that was not an option for me. I knew I was coming home immediately after school. So yeah, I never had a plan. I knew that I wanted to teach. Even then, I have always had a dream of opening a studio one day. And even back then, like I thought like that was a possibility for me. I obviously wanted to dance much longer than I did because of COVID that kind of screwed everything up. Like I think that I probably would have been on for probably two more years. I really wanted to do like five years and then be done. Um, but I had to roll with the punches and change what I was doing and ended up getting a normal ass job and teaching on the side and doing Sixers and whatever. But now I'm like, I don't, all I wanna do is teach now. You know what I mean? Like that's where my heart is. That's where I feel like I am the most me. That's where I feel like I have the most impact. I'm able to share the most. So no, I did not have a plan, not ever, not one time. Yeah, we were winging it from the jump here.
Jessica
Yeah. I bring that up to say that you built such an amazing life for yourself with such incredible support systems and of course your puppy. The love of your life. Milo! We were fast friends when I met him. But
Angela
the love of my life. Yeah, he's a lover. He's a lover.
Jessica
You are carving a unique path for yourself because you are a unique person with unique circumstances in your life and who knows what else you can create. That's the reason I brought up the performance videos because–
Angela
No, yes, and I would love to brainstorm with you because I know that there is something more for me to be able to teach and use my story to inspire and I just don't know how to do both of those things in one and which is why I am grateful that you know TikTok kind of just happened randomly for me because I do feel like that is a start, I haveI have been able to share my story. I literally posted a video of me literally bawling my eyes out two weeks ago. That is so not me. Never have I ever. So a lot of the times, if I'm like having a hard day, I know that you love to journal, what I have started to do is set up my camera and talk to myself. That way I can talk to myself through things, okay? So I wake up and I'm like super sick and I like was having one of those days and I had like recorded myself and I like was watching it back to kind of just process and I'm like, you know what? Like this is so much more valuable, out in the world than it is just sitting in my camera roll. And that video I wanna say has like, oh, I wanna say over a hundred thousand views and a lot of comments and a lot of people in support. And thank you so much for sharing your story. And basically what I had said was, I'm sure that my kids wonder why I am so adamant about them dancing full out all the time, because I get pissed. I get pissed. If you're in my class and you're giving me 50% energy, get out. And I said, it's because I can't dance full out anymore. So when I see a kid in my class that has a fully functioning body and fully functioning lungs and they are half-assing everything in my class, it breaks my heart because there's nothing more that I wanna do than dance full out. You know what I mean? They have such a gift that they don't even know until it's taken away. And basically I explain like, I can't dance anymore because of my CF. But like, if you have a healthy body and you have healthy lungs, consider yourself lucky. And I like ended it there. And the response that I got from that message, from young dancers commenting and being like, I will always think of this. I will always dance full out because of this message. Like you have really changed the way that I thought about dancing. I'm like, oh shit, like this is important. And people should know, people should know my story. Not that I'm like a crazy person, but because I think that it can help a lot of people. Because I never had a dance role model like that to look up to in a situation that was similar to me. And to have a lot of kids and have moms in my comments saying like, I have two little dancers with CF and you know, this was so inspiring to watch. Like that's crazy–
Jessica
Mm-hmm.
Angela
– that I'm able to like reach these people now. Yeah, I think that TikTok is a good start. I just have to figure out a way to streamline and do something to combine all of those things together.
Jessica
Do you have a website?
Angela
I don't have a website.
Jessica
I'll make you a website. I told you I was going to do your wedding website. I said, give me the, I'll do the wedding website. I said that.
Angela
I love my manager. I have put in zero thought into the wedding website.
Jessica
But I can I'll make your website.
Angela
I mean, from TikTok, I've gotten a lot of like private lessons and the things like virtual stuff, but I've just done it like through, I've just given them like my business email. I've never done like a–
Jessica
I mean, people are so lucky to get to work with you and what you have to share is so vital. And you have changed my life so much. And so the fact that you're putting out there for your story and who you are to impact so many people is just incredible.
Angela
Just at this point, like after everything happened with my job and being put into this situation, I'm like, it's now or never. It's literally now or never. You're going to figure it out now or you're never going to figure it out. So yeah.
Jessica
I just had the craziest deja vu. That makes me feel like I am–
Angela
Really? We've been here before.
Jessica
– we definitely have.
Angela
I've definitely FaceTimed you from this bed before, so maybe that was it. Hahaha.
Jessica
No, it's the whole thing because I've never sat at this desk before. I've never done a podcast interview with you before. No, it was like the whole thing and I knew what you're going to say. I knew you were going to say something specific like that. Yeah. Weird.
Angela
to finish it off like that. That is so crazy.
Jessica
So if you have one final, I mean, you've basically given infinite words of wisdom, but if you had one final thing that you wanted to share, specifically to our younger students, but really to everybody, what would you share?
Angela
I would say dance as long as you can, in any capacity that you can, because yeah, it's good for your body, but it's just as good for your mind to be able to move in any capacity. And any body is a dancing body, so everyone should be moving. But especially with my younger dancers. Don't let one comment from one judge or one teacher make you feel like you are not good enough in that space because there is absolutely a classroom where you will be respected and seen and celebrated, because in my classroom everybody is celebrated. Yeah, that and just dance full out as long as you can because there's a lot of us out there who can't do what everyone would love to.
Jessica
I mean, I'm taking that advice. For years, I've been just on this rollercoaster of not being able to get back into dancing and moving my body and needing to come back to my body through other things like yoga, but feeling so fearful and overwhelmed to get back to dance. So I need to.
Angela
It is, it's just such a, it's so fearful because of the expectations that we put on ourselves. And I know, I know because that has literally been my life over the past six or less months. Um, but yeah, I even like, I've put on ballet classes on YouTube and I've done like a quick barre just to get my body moving. Like I am trying to get more comfortable, um, doing it, but yeah, for all my younger dancers out there. Don't let one person, one judge, one teacher, one bad experience make you feel like you are a bad dancer. Because guess what? You don't have to be Misty Copeland to be a good dancer. You can be a little two-year-old girl who's spinning in the circle. You can be the little hip hop boy in the hip hop boys class who do coffee grinders. Don't feel restricted because dance is truly the most freeing feeling, right? So live in that as long as you can.
Jessica
In my yoga training, the biggest thing that helped me heal and I kept coming back to is that we start right where we are, right in this moment, starting where we are with what we have. And it's so hard to remember, but that's what I wanna say to you. It's how you've lived your life, but now as we're talking about these things that are still giving...
Angela
Right.
Jessica
some heartbreak and trying to rebuild and overcome. That's just what I'll send off with you.
Angela
Love that. And yes, I am getting a therapist because I...
Jessica
Good.
Angela
Clearly I need one.
Jessica
Have you ever had one?
Angela
No, but Jess, when I tell you that, when I first had this epiphany and breakdown, I cried, I'm not kidding you, all day. Like, Antonis would literally just look at me and I'd be like, bahhh! Like, bad, like terrible. And two of my closest friends actually are therapists. One, Casey, who is another bridesmaid in the wedding, and she was like, doll what is going on like and she really helped talk me through that day and she was like we're gonna help you find a therapist send me your information, so even now i have a great support system around me as i'm entering these like new challenges unforeseen challenges or just buried challenges that i've now brought up to the surface i should say um yeah but every day is a work in progress on this new journey for sure.
Jessica
I’m excited for you to find a good therapist.
Angela
Yeah, me too.
Jessica
I just found one that I really like. A new one yeah.
Angela
Really? Good.
Jessica
I've been with her for a month. She's great. But you gotta shop around.
Angela
No, I will. And that's what they said. My girlfriend said too. They're like, don't just stick with your first.
Jessica
Yeah, it's like dating.
Angela
Yeah, you got to be compatible, right? That's what I've heard.
Jessica
Yeah, none of us are with our first boyfriends. Hahaha.
Angela
I love him to death, but not for me, not for me.
Jessica
We love you.
Angela
Love you!
Jessica
Okay, well, Angela DeStasio, how can people find you? Maybe say you're TikTok and you're Insta.
Angela
Yes ma'am. My TikTok handle is just at Angestasio, A-N-G-D-E-S-T-A-S-I-O. And it is the same on Instagram.
Jessica
Cool, and I'll put it in the show notes too.
Angela
Yay! I had a great time.
Jessica
Yay, Angela, I love you so much. You are my special, my dearest friends. Oh, how I love thee.
Angela
I love you. You are one of my dearest. My dearest. But you so are. You so are. I would not, I literally would not be this open with any other one of my friends. Truly. You just pull it out of me, girl. I don't know what it is.
Jessica
I, it's cause I just never stopped trying.
Angela
No, it's literally it's because you've never once let me breathe ever.
Jessica
10 years later she's like, fine, gosh, it's more exhausting to hold it in than deal with this bullshit.
Angela
Yeah, right. I'm like, God might as well just tell her now. She's been asking for 11 years.
Jessica
It's good. We're in it for the long haul, you know? Okay, well I love you.
Angela
Antonis wants to say hi.
Jessica – Outro
Thank you so much for listening to this podcast. It's a dream come true to share these stories with you. And I hope that there's something that you can take away that betters your life. We'll see you next time.